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The Five F’s, Vulnerability, Priorates and Making Change | Down the Rabbit Hole with Lifestyle Mentor Dai Manuel

The Five F’s, Vulnerability, Priorates and Making Change | Down the Rabbit Hole with Lifestyle Mentor Dai Manuel

"I knew if I could help make an impact and influence people to shift that perspective only a half a degree, I'm not saying like a full 180 here, like half a degree. And I know if they can commit to doing that half a degree for, let's just say, 28 days, t...

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"I knew if I could help make an impact and influence people to shift that perspective only a half a degree, I'm not saying like a full 180 here, like half a degree. And I know if they can commit to doing that half a degree for, let's just say, 28 days, they're going to end up in a very different place than where they started.” Dai Manuel is a coach, mentor, author, and speaker who helps people get out of their own way. He is also a dad of two teenage girls and has been dating his wife for 23 years. This is Dai Manuel's story... I'm Dai Manuel, and I help people get out of their own way. I have a natural ability to look in people and see the potential that they unfortunately can't see in themselves based on life circumstances. I quit my 17 year career, and I started writing a book. I wanted to create a book that would help individuals because I know it's just all about mindset. I am happier, healthier and living my best life with my wife and daughters. Now I help people make the changes in their lives so they can live their best lives too. Everything I now find worth while in my life started with a little vulnerability with my wife and is guided with my 5 F’s. In this episode, you will learn the following: 1. The 5 F’s and what they can mean for you. 2. What is the meaning of success, and how can we achieve it? 3. What is the difference between happiness and joy?

4. Vulnerability for men is not what you think.

5. How to start changing your life right now

 

Book References in the Show:

Dai Manuel's Whole Life Fitness Manifesto: 30 Minutes a Day for a Healthier Body, Mind and Spirit

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1928055079/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_D3MZS68K64FVZJDAR6DE

Mans Search for Meaning - Viktor E. Frankl – Available on Amazon

The Big Leap - Gay Hendricks- Available on Amazon

Guest Resources: http://www.joinwlfm.com/

https://www.instagram.com/daimanuel/

https://www.daimanuel.com/

https://www.instagram.com/daimanuel/

https://www.tiktok.com/@daimanuel

https://twitter.com/daimanuel

https://www.facebook.com/CoachDaiManuel/

Other episodes you'll enjoy:

Fatherhood, Family and Faith with Evan Herrman https://www.thefalliblemanpodcast.com/fatherhood-family-and-faith-with-evan-herrman/

Faith, Family, Freedom with Entrepreneur Don Abod

https://www.thefalliblemanpodcast.com/faith-family-freedom-with-entrepreneur-don-abod/

Telos | This is the EASIEST way to find Yours (Why MEN Should)

https://www.thefalliblemanpodcast.com/telos-this-is-the-easiest-way-to-find-yours-why-men-should/

 

Loved this episode? Leave us a review and rating here: https://www.thefalliblemanpodcast.com/

Transcript

1 00:00:01,290 --> 00:00:02,910 Here's the million dollar question. 2 00:00:03,390 --> 00:00:07,050 How do men like us reach our full potential and grow into the men we 3 00:00:07,050 --> 00:00:11,190 dream of being while taking care of our responsibilities, working, 4 00:00:11,370 --> 00:00:15,870 being good husbands, fathers, and still take care of ourselves? 5 00:00:16,740 --> 00:00:18,450 That's the question in this podcast. 6 00:00:18,750 --> 00:00:20,040 We'll help you with those answers. 7 00:00:20,040 --> 00:00:22,950 My name is Brent and welcome to the Fallible Man Podcast. 8 00:00:24,090 --> 00:00:25,500 Welcome to Fall, Bloom n Podcast. 9 00:00:25,500 --> 00:00:27,450 Your home for all things, man, husband, and father. 10 00:00:27,720 --> 00:00:30,090 Big shout out to the fallible nation that keeps us going and 11 00:00:30,090 --> 00:00:31,200 makes things like this possible. 12 00:00:31,200 --> 00:00:33,540 And a warm welcome to our first time listeners. 13 00:00:33,540 --> 00:00:35,790 Thank you for sharing your time and attention with us. 14 00:00:36,089 --> 00:00:38,040 We know you have a lot of options and we're thrilled 15 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:39,030 that you're here with us today. 16 00:00:39,480 --> 00:00:43,709 My name is Brent, and today my special guest is Dai Manuel coach, mentor, 17 00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:45,930 author, speaker, and so much more. 18 00:00:46,290 --> 00:00:49,680 In today's show, we're gonna touch on the five Fs of men and vulnerability 19 00:00:49,685 --> 00:00:51,239 and being on the good side of change. 20 00:00:51,300 --> 00:00:51,779 Dai. 21 00:00:52,100 --> 00:00:53,150 Welcome to the show. 22 00:00:53,860 --> 00:00:55,905 Whohoo, Brent, thank you. 23 00:00:56,265 --> 00:00:57,855 Thank you for the opportunity to be here. 24 00:00:58,125 --> 00:01:00,834 I had the lovely opportunity of being at the conference. 25 00:01:00,901 --> 00:01:03,709 Gosh, it feels like it was yesterday, but I know it was months ago. 26 00:01:04,129 --> 00:01:07,964 And it's just very cool to now circle up and reconnect in this format. 27 00:01:08,004 --> 00:01:08,994 Anyways, thank you. 28 00:01:09,294 --> 00:01:09,684 It's an honor 29 00:01:09,684 --> 00:01:10,044 to be here. 30 00:01:10,051 --> 00:01:12,811 And I'm excited cuz you're gonna be at our next conference in February. 31 00:01:12,861 --> 00:01:13,181 Yeah. 32 00:01:13,951 --> 00:01:17,101 And so I'm super excited you guys, if you enjoy the podcast. 33 00:01:18,031 --> 00:01:22,231 Come meet Dai in person in February at the Phoenix Conference. 34 00:01:22,231 --> 00:01:23,371 February 10th and 11th. 35 00:01:23,821 --> 00:01:28,251 Tickets are on sale on the website, www.fallibleman.com/thephoenix. 36 00:01:28,621 --> 00:01:31,201 Right now early bridge specials are still going and you'll get to hang 37 00:01:31,201 --> 00:01:34,591 out more with Dai and trust me guys, if you enjoy him on the podcast, 38 00:01:34,591 --> 00:01:36,481 he is even more fun in person. 39 00:01:37,201 --> 00:01:40,591 We had a great time when he was here for the last conference Dai. 40 00:01:40,801 --> 00:01:42,121 I don't do the big introductions. 41 00:01:42,121 --> 00:01:43,821 So tell us in your own words, who is. 42 00:01:44,391 --> 00:01:45,071 Dai Manuel 43 00:01:45,286 --> 00:01:45,776 , geez. 44 00:01:45,866 --> 00:01:46,196 Wow. 45 00:01:46,196 --> 00:01:47,516 Let's just start with the easy question. 46 00:01:47,546 --> 00:01:47,876 Okay? 47 00:01:48,056 --> 00:01:49,526 Uh, no, I'm just joking. 48 00:01:49,564 --> 00:01:52,682 Listen, Dai Manuel, first off, let's just get the elephant outta the 49 00:01:52,687 --> 00:01:53,972 room here, or identify the elephant. 50 00:01:54,122 --> 00:01:55,742 It's a weird name, totally weird name. 51 00:01:56,022 --> 00:01:57,512 Dai is Welsh for David. 52 00:01:58,382 --> 00:02:02,402 Okay, Manuel is Portuguese Dai Manuel, so Welsh and Portuguese 53 00:02:02,402 --> 00:02:03,069 says don't worry about it. 54 00:02:03,069 --> 00:02:03,519 I'm Canadian. 55 00:02:03,669 --> 00:02:03,879 Okay. 56 00:02:03,879 --> 00:02:04,209 That's it. 57 00:02:04,239 --> 00:02:04,959 That's all I gotta say. 58 00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:08,806 Now, , as far as who am I, as I always like to lead off. 59 00:02:08,864 --> 00:02:10,754 First and foremost, I'm a. 60 00:02:11,494 --> 00:02:13,900 Dad of two teenage girls, they're now oh my gosh. 61 00:02:13,900 --> 00:02:16,090 Almost gonna be 20 and 18 in the next few months. 62 00:02:16,690 --> 00:02:17,020 Nice. 63 00:02:17,110 --> 00:02:20,215 This feels weird even saying that . But I've got two beautiful girls 64 00:02:20,245 --> 00:02:23,335 Chardonnay and Bree, that's wine and cheese for those that figured it out. 65 00:02:23,396 --> 00:02:26,931 And then I've been dating my wife for 22, almost 23 years. 66 00:02:27,331 --> 00:02:29,487 And that's, really, if I have to sell up, who am I? 67 00:02:29,504 --> 00:02:30,478 That's a big part of it. 68 00:02:30,478 --> 00:02:32,068 That is really who, the why. 69 00:02:32,068 --> 00:02:32,578 The what? 70 00:02:32,578 --> 00:02:33,118 The how. 71 00:02:33,171 --> 00:02:33,911 They're my everything. 72 00:02:34,801 --> 00:02:38,426 Outside of that, for my own personal, I guess, how would I identify? 73 00:02:38,431 --> 00:02:38,796 Just me. 74 00:02:38,831 --> 00:02:41,406 I'm someone that just loves helping people get outta their own way. 75 00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:46,536 I have a natural ability to look in people and see the potential that 76 00:02:46,536 --> 00:02:49,926 they unfortunately can't see in themselves based on life circumstances. 77 00:02:50,496 --> 00:02:52,616 Let's be honest, a lot of us lose that edge. 78 00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:55,962 That edge when it comes to how we interpret our life and 79 00:02:55,962 --> 00:02:57,402 how we show up for our life. 80 00:02:57,428 --> 00:02:58,466 And it's tough, right? 81 00:02:58,466 --> 00:03:00,566 When you fall off that path, how do you get back on? 82 00:03:00,566 --> 00:03:03,056 And sometimes it's nice just to know that there's somebody in your corner 83 00:03:03,356 --> 00:03:07,106 that empathetically can relate and say, You know what, You're not alone. 84 00:03:07,586 --> 00:03:08,186 It's okay. 85 00:03:09,176 --> 00:03:09,716 And that's it. 86 00:03:09,746 --> 00:03:13,796 So every day I get to do cool stuff that allows me to align with that and 87 00:03:13,796 --> 00:03:15,056 help other people work through that. 88 00:03:15,056 --> 00:03:17,516 So that's who I am in a nutshell. 89 00:03:17,575 --> 00:03:19,429 think one of the things that stood. 90 00:03:19,465 --> 00:03:22,806 When we were first meeting each other through the software we used to connect 91 00:03:22,806 --> 00:03:26,736 with other podcasters is, I love the fact that one of the top things you 92 00:03:26,736 --> 00:03:31,126 list is that you've been dating your wife for 23 years now, that is just. 93 00:03:32,496 --> 00:03:34,726 I love the priorities on your I. 94 00:03:34,726 --> 00:03:36,035 Cause get to talk to a lot of people. 95 00:03:36,035 --> 00:03:39,455 That's one of the great things about being podcasters, you know, no doubt is 96 00:03:39,455 --> 00:03:41,015 just the cool people you get to meet. 97 00:03:41,075 --> 00:03:45,475 But I talk to a lot of people and right there, that is priority number one 98 00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:47,875 is I'm a dad and I'm dating my wife. 99 00:03:48,655 --> 00:03:49,795 It's like, bam. 100 00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:54,295 Clarity . No, thanks. 101 00:03:54,295 --> 00:03:58,135 You were, are the COO of a large scale business. 102 00:03:58,555 --> 00:03:58,885 Mm-hmm. 103 00:04:00,145 --> 00:04:03,245 . And then you started getting into some other spaces. 104 00:04:03,245 --> 00:04:03,943 Why did you change? 105 00:04:03,943 --> 00:04:07,567 Most people would be like, Wait that's, People spend their whole lives 106 00:04:07,567 --> 00:04:09,847 trying to get to those levels Yeah. 107 00:04:09,997 --> 00:04:10,477 Positions. 108 00:04:10,482 --> 00:04:10,537 Yeah. 109 00:04:10,897 --> 00:04:12,047 Why the change? 110 00:04:12,062 --> 00:04:14,972 It's, you've actually kind of had the answer within the question. 111 00:04:15,152 --> 00:04:17,942 And what I mean by that is when you ask their brand, I think this is so 112 00:04:17,942 --> 00:04:20,359 appropriate and I'm sure there's a lot of people out there that are like 113 00:04:20,459 --> 00:04:26,039 on their edge, like, Yeah, why do we pursue to begin with those levels? 114 00:04:26,078 --> 00:04:27,784 Like the why, like why did we get started? 115 00:04:27,784 --> 00:04:32,134 And if I'm perfectly honest with you, Bryan ego drove me to 116 00:04:32,134 --> 00:04:33,554 get started and to pursue that. 117 00:04:33,554 --> 00:04:35,887 Success is highly subjective. 118 00:04:36,757 --> 00:04:41,527 And yet I had this knack of trying to qualify and quantify success, 119 00:04:41,557 --> 00:04:45,731 especially the quantification, meaning that, I would look at accolades and 120 00:04:45,731 --> 00:04:50,561 affirmations and praise, but this also on top of that, I'd be looking 121 00:04:50,566 --> 00:04:54,311 at money in the bank, Having the cars, having the home, having the toys. 122 00:04:54,311 --> 00:04:56,951 Like for me, that's what I believe success was. 123 00:04:56,951 --> 00:05:01,841 And so from my early twenties into my early thirties, that's what I accumulated. 124 00:05:01,846 --> 00:05:04,271 I pursued a lot of that, thinking that it was gonna fulfill 125 00:05:04,271 --> 00:05:06,731 me, make me feel successful. 126 00:05:07,271 --> 00:05:12,251 But here's the thing, the more I acquired, the more that I accomplished, 127 00:05:13,811 --> 00:05:15,371 the more unfulfilled I felt. 128 00:05:17,606 --> 00:05:19,196 And it's because I was living in the ego man. 129 00:05:19,286 --> 00:05:23,036 I was living, looking for something to satisfy me outside me without 130 00:05:23,036 --> 00:05:26,156 saying, You know what, maybe I gotta go inward to figure this stuff out. 131 00:05:27,236 --> 00:05:28,946 Cause that's where the massive disconnect was. 132 00:05:28,964 --> 00:05:32,568 I'd been someone, I'd come from a fitness and wellness industry back a background. 133 00:05:33,018 --> 00:05:35,808 And then let's be fair fitness industry. 134 00:05:35,808 --> 00:05:36,888 I mean, just go on Instagram. 135 00:05:36,888 --> 00:05:38,178 It's a lot of smoke and mirrors. 136 00:05:38,838 --> 00:05:42,003 It's a lot of filtering and it's highly cur. 137 00:05:43,023 --> 00:05:46,837 But it's also, people trying to show certain physiques and certain ideas 138 00:05:46,837 --> 00:05:49,300 and it's a noisy space and it's confusing and you have to start to 139 00:05:49,300 --> 00:05:50,650 question what's real and what's not. 140 00:05:52,210 --> 00:05:53,740 I didn't wanna be a part of that anymore. 141 00:05:54,340 --> 00:05:55,990 I had grown, I had evolved. 142 00:05:55,990 --> 00:05:59,170 I had made some big massive changes, which we might get into today. 143 00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:04,520 And in going through that, I realized the path that I was on for 17 years. 144 00:06:04,535 --> 00:06:06,905 Literally co-founding a company, building it to eight figures a. 145 00:06:07,790 --> 00:06:09,320 Thinking that, Wow, this is it. 146 00:06:09,410 --> 00:06:10,760 This is what I'm meant to be doing the rest of my life. 147 00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:15,410 But the more success as I was quantifying it, I achieved, the 148 00:06:15,410 --> 00:06:19,880 more I felt disconnected and unhappy, unfulfilled, lacking joy. 149 00:06:20,930 --> 00:06:23,750 So I did the hard thing, the real hard thing. 150 00:06:24,920 --> 00:06:29,360 I quit , you know, I, I quit a 17 year career. 151 00:06:29,390 --> 00:06:31,520 Very stable, very safe. 152 00:06:32,795 --> 00:06:37,205 And I, I ended up writing a book during that final few months before I left. 153 00:06:37,265 --> 00:06:40,909 And it was published about four months after I exited outta that business. 154 00:06:41,269 --> 00:06:43,019 And it opened up a world of opportunity. 155 00:06:43,019 --> 00:06:44,219 Cause I, I wanted to create a book. 156 00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:46,889 Oh, thank you for sharing that, Brent a book that would help individuals. 157 00:06:46,894 --> 00:06:51,479 Cause, being in fitness literally for 28 years now, I've heard it all. 158 00:06:52,229 --> 00:06:54,629 Every excuse you can give it to me and I've probably heard it. 159 00:06:54,749 --> 00:06:55,119 Okay. 160 00:06:55,146 --> 00:06:57,606 And so my thing was like, I know it's just all about mindset. 161 00:06:57,606 --> 00:06:58,176 It's our mental. 162 00:06:58,881 --> 00:07:01,791 It's our perception on not only the world that we live, but also 163 00:07:01,791 --> 00:07:03,081 how we see ourselves in that world. 164 00:07:03,561 --> 00:07:07,761 And I knew if I could help make an impact and influence people to shift 165 00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,681 that perspective only a half a degree. 166 00:07:09,681 --> 00:07:13,491 I'm not saying like a full 180 here, like half a degree. 167 00:07:14,031 --> 00:07:16,401 And I know if they can commit to doing that half a degree 168 00:07:16,401 --> 00:07:18,201 for, let's just say 28 days. 169 00:07:18,201 --> 00:07:19,071 Mm-hmm. 170 00:07:19,466 --> 00:07:21,721 , they're gonna end up in a very different place than where they. 171 00:07:21,750 --> 00:07:23,700 And I like to use the Ocean Liners as an example. 172 00:07:23,700 --> 00:07:27,445 If, you said a trajectory, you change that degree by half a degree and you continue 173 00:07:27,445 --> 00:07:32,335 to on it for 12 hours, by the end of 12 hours, you are massively off course. 174 00:07:33,835 --> 00:07:37,495 This also works in a positive way though, if we wanna recalibrate and reconfigure 175 00:07:37,585 --> 00:07:38,785 the direction that we have in life. 176 00:07:39,385 --> 00:07:41,736 And so that's what I had to do with my own life first though, cause 177 00:07:41,765 --> 00:07:44,165 I needed to get that clarity and to figure out what do I wanna do? 178 00:07:44,165 --> 00:07:46,745 What makes you feel fulfilled, happy, and joyful every. 179 00:07:47,885 --> 00:07:48,995 And then I just got to work. 180 00:07:49,445 --> 00:07:49,955 Okay. 181 00:07:50,075 --> 00:07:51,605 And I was filled with a lot of fear. 182 00:07:51,665 --> 00:07:51,965 Okay? 183 00:07:52,235 --> 00:07:53,525 Bottom line, done. 184 00:07:53,525 --> 00:07:54,335 Lots of fear. 185 00:07:54,485 --> 00:07:55,955 It was intimidating, it was scary. 186 00:07:56,405 --> 00:07:59,885 But thankfully my family was by my side and they were like, You know what? 187 00:07:59,945 --> 00:08:00,665 Let's do this. 188 00:08:00,875 --> 00:08:01,745 You can do this. 189 00:08:02,105 --> 00:08:03,005 We're behind you. 190 00:08:03,905 --> 00:08:06,725 And that's what allowed me to endure the really hard days. 191 00:08:06,861 --> 00:08:08,301 Those days where you question everything. 192 00:08:08,391 --> 00:08:11,121 And thank goodness I have them in my life, and that's what allows me to endure. 193 00:08:11,811 --> 00:08:13,941 Hence, what's my two most important things? 194 00:08:13,941 --> 00:08:14,481 That's in my by. 195 00:08:15,396 --> 00:08:19,446 I'm a dad, and I'm dating my wife, cuz I know if I got those things figured out, 196 00:08:19,836 --> 00:08:21,306 hey, whatever else I do, it's just fun. 197 00:08:21,516 --> 00:08:21,756 You know? 198 00:08:21,756 --> 00:08:22,266 It's just fun. 199 00:08:23,076 --> 00:08:23,826 Now see, a 200 00:08:23,831 --> 00:08:25,386 lot of guys struggle, right? 201 00:08:25,386 --> 00:08:28,264 Cause I've told people I've talked to, look I talk to people who have 202 00:08:28,414 --> 00:08:32,584 made it by all measures of quote unquote, what we call success. 203 00:08:32,864 --> 00:08:33,214 Mm. 204 00:08:33,514 --> 00:08:36,334 And I've talked to a lot of guys who have quote unquote 205 00:08:36,334 --> 00:08:38,164 made it, who went, got there. 206 00:08:39,334 --> 00:08:42,064 Uh, this, this is not what I thought it was. 207 00:08:42,304 --> 00:08:45,994 This is not what makes my life good or happy. 208 00:08:46,744 --> 00:08:48,269 And for guys who are struggling, right? 209 00:08:48,269 --> 00:08:50,519 Cause we're doing okay. 210 00:08:50,669 --> 00:08:52,859 I'm not rich by any means, but Sarah and I do okay. 211 00:08:53,909 --> 00:08:56,806 But we had a lot of years where we're, we still had some 212 00:08:56,806 --> 00:08:58,186 back deaths for a long time. 213 00:08:58,186 --> 00:09:02,326 That took years to pay off because for a lot of years we were struggling from day. 214 00:09:03,436 --> 00:09:07,636 And so there are a lot of guys who are in that place in their lives right now who 215 00:09:08,116 --> 00:09:11,356 hear somebody say something like that, and they're like, You're outta your mind. 216 00:09:12,436 --> 00:09:15,136 There's money does buy happiness. 217 00:09:15,136 --> 00:09:15,736 They lie. 218 00:09:15,801 --> 00:09:19,641 It, Well, yeah it buys a lot of things, but it also, 219 00:09:21,141 --> 00:09:23,491 But Brent, just real quick, happiness is temporary. 220 00:09:23,496 --> 00:09:24,331 Joy is permanent. 221 00:09:24,331 --> 00:09:25,638 And so you gotta keep that in mind. 222 00:09:25,638 --> 00:09:28,738 Yes, money will buy you happiness, but it's short. 223 00:09:29,838 --> 00:09:31,308 And that's why we're never satisfied. 224 00:09:32,298 --> 00:09:33,408 You know, we're never satisfied. 225 00:09:34,038 --> 00:09:36,408 There's always that one more thing, one more thing, one more thing. 226 00:09:37,168 --> 00:09:40,258 And we're also very good at leveraging our future to pay for the now. 227 00:09:40,282 --> 00:09:43,585 And it, when you get that into focus and you really understand that concept, 228 00:09:43,975 --> 00:09:46,757 it's a amount of just a little bit of self-control, a little bit of 229 00:09:46,757 --> 00:09:48,107 discipline to bring into focus. 230 00:09:48,107 --> 00:09:48,977 What truly matters. 231 00:09:48,977 --> 00:09:51,527 And what I often challenge people on when I'm working with men on this 232 00:09:51,527 --> 00:09:55,277 especially, is like, bring that into focus because all of a sudden you. 233 00:09:56,162 --> 00:09:56,432 Wow. 234 00:09:56,432 --> 00:09:58,622 It's not only very accessible and it's here right now. 235 00:09:59,192 --> 00:10:00,222 It doesn't cost anything. 236 00:10:00,273 --> 00:10:00,933 It just doesn't. 237 00:10:01,533 --> 00:10:03,723 And yet the fulfillment we get from some people just question. 238 00:10:03,723 --> 00:10:05,823 How can I be feeling this way and achieve this? 239 00:10:06,393 --> 00:10:07,563 And it didn't cost me anything. 240 00:10:07,568 --> 00:10:11,548 Cuz it, it just so different from what we actually have grown up thinking, so it's 241 00:10:11,612 --> 00:10:13,821 it's hard for us to just commit to that. 242 00:10:13,821 --> 00:10:17,230 And I can speak to this very, personally cuz I didn't start making 243 00:10:17,230 --> 00:10:19,480 these kind of pivots in my life until I was in my early thirties. 244 00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:20,520 And only cuz I got to a. 245 00:10:21,385 --> 00:10:25,435 Where I was threatened to lose everything that mattered to me, and it was based 246 00:10:25,435 --> 00:10:29,037 on my abuse of alcohol and narcotics, and just that that my way of coping with 247 00:10:29,037 --> 00:10:30,777 stress, anxiety, and overwhelming life. 248 00:10:30,777 --> 00:10:31,377 That was it. 249 00:10:31,677 --> 00:10:35,600 I went to a bottle and it, massive, almost 13 years to a day, I made a decision 250 00:10:35,600 --> 00:10:38,450 to go one month, or sorry, one year without alcohol, and that one year's now 251 00:10:38,450 --> 00:10:42,620 turned into 13 years and a lifestyle and opened up so many opportunities for me. 252 00:10:43,205 --> 00:10:46,745 But I had to get to the place where I was like, not only on rock bottom, but 253 00:10:46,745 --> 00:10:51,425 I was actually under the rock in rock bottom with my feet sticking out, my hands 254 00:10:51,425 --> 00:10:56,059 sticking out, and really just stuck and afraid and uncertain and so anyways, yeah, 255 00:10:56,064 --> 00:10:58,429 that was, I just wanted to throw that in there cuz I, I love what you're saying, 256 00:10:58,434 --> 00:11:00,559 but it's like that little piece right? 257 00:11:00,619 --> 00:11:01,459 That we sometimes forget 258 00:11:01,487 --> 00:11:02,321 that's the piece we miss. 259 00:11:02,326 --> 00:11:02,631 Yeah, Yeah. 260 00:11:02,631 --> 00:11:02,911 That's, yeah. 261 00:11:02,911 --> 00:11:03,641 That's the kinda, Yeah. 262 00:11:03,821 --> 00:11:07,271 Most of us don't separate happiness and joy. 263 00:11:07,571 --> 00:11:07,841 Yeah. 264 00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:08,141 Right. 265 00:11:08,169 --> 00:11:09,884 We see it as something together. 266 00:11:10,594 --> 00:11:11,614 We see it as one and the same. 267 00:11:11,614 --> 00:11:16,114 We, most people don't understand there's a really big, massive difference. 268 00:11:16,324 --> 00:11:17,644 Massive between the two. 269 00:11:18,064 --> 00:11:18,334 Yeah. 270 00:11:18,904 --> 00:11:22,174 And so, no, I'm really glad you clarified that, reiterated on that point. 271 00:11:22,174 --> 00:11:27,904 Cause it is, it's shocking how many people don't separate those things. 272 00:11:27,931 --> 00:11:31,471 And I wish there was a good explanation as to why , other than we're just not taught 273 00:11:31,471 --> 00:11:32,971 to separate those things in this cultures. 274 00:11:33,181 --> 00:11:34,201 That's, I just think that's it. 275 00:11:34,201 --> 00:11:35,701 It just doesn't come up from conversation. 276 00:11:35,701 --> 00:11:36,991 It's not like we're setting out. 277 00:11:36,991 --> 00:11:42,575 I think we're very quick to just believe that, pick up the source and all these 278 00:11:42,575 --> 00:11:45,575 words that are alike each other, They must all mean the same thing, but they don't. 279 00:11:46,625 --> 00:11:48,635 And the English language doesn't do us any favors on this. 280 00:11:48,702 --> 00:11:50,725 The English language is really confusing, to be honest. 281 00:11:50,730 --> 00:11:53,878 And yeah, I'd hate to be someone that had to learn it as a second or even a third 282 00:11:53,878 --> 00:11:56,977 language cuz it's like it was hard enough to learn it as my first language . That 283 00:11:56,982 --> 00:11:59,918 being said, I think it's our understanding and our relationship with words and, 284 00:11:59,970 --> 00:12:03,775 like my TEDx top last year was all about vulnerability and that understanding that 285 00:12:04,195 --> 00:12:07,345 vulnerability is actually a skill and it's not a negative word with negative 286 00:12:07,345 --> 00:12:09,505 connotations unless you apply that. 287 00:12:09,591 --> 00:12:11,241 We give the meaning to things. 288 00:12:11,297 --> 00:12:12,507 Are you familiar with Victor Frankel? 289 00:12:12,536 --> 00:12:16,276 He wrote Men Search for Meaning, And in it he talks about this idea, right? 290 00:12:16,276 --> 00:12:19,416 This idea that, even to ask the question, So what's the meaning of life? 291 00:12:20,076 --> 00:12:21,396 It's one highly subjective. 292 00:12:21,396 --> 00:12:25,926 And two, the oxymoron of that question is whatever answer you give is correct. 293 00:12:26,946 --> 00:12:30,296 Because we give the meaning, we give it. 294 00:12:30,363 --> 00:12:31,010 It's 42. 295 00:12:31,190 --> 00:12:31,910 We all know this. 296 00:12:32,090 --> 00:12:32,270 Yeah. 297 00:12:32,270 --> 00:12:32,810 42. 298 00:12:32,810 --> 00:12:34,580 I love that Hitchhiker's guy, the gala. 299 00:12:34,580 --> 00:12:35,090 It's lovely. 300 00:12:35,148 --> 00:12:35,951 I love dunk sas. 301 00:12:35,968 --> 00:12:37,788 But yeah, it's so true, right? 302 00:12:37,788 --> 00:12:38,838 Like it's just, it's so true. 303 00:12:38,838 --> 00:12:40,068 So it's, yeah. 304 00:12:40,068 --> 00:12:41,367 It, life's so funny, right? 305 00:12:41,373 --> 00:12:41,949 is funny. 306 00:12:41,949 --> 00:12:45,779 It, it is pretty easy to stand back and just laugh at it all, but in a 307 00:12:45,779 --> 00:12:48,823 real positive way and be like, I just can't take this so darn seriously. 308 00:12:49,243 --> 00:12:54,313 Cause one, you have a lot more fun and you have better conversations and to be quite. 309 00:12:55,228 --> 00:12:57,199 You tend to live a healthier, longer life, And then you don't 310 00:12:57,199 --> 00:12:58,099 have to take my word on that. 311 00:12:58,099 --> 00:12:58,789 Science proves it 312 00:12:59,749 --> 00:13:00,559 . Small happiness. 313 00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:01,489 Then what's your favorite ice 314 00:13:01,494 --> 00:13:01,699 cream? 315 00:13:03,019 --> 00:13:05,449 Um, well, if I'm honest, it's coconut. 316 00:13:06,289 --> 00:13:07,549 I love coconut ice cream. 317 00:13:07,639 --> 00:13:12,079 I'm really a big coconut fan, so it's also like I used to give the answer vanilla. 318 00:13:12,109 --> 00:13:17,149 My wife is like, You are so vanilla . I was like, Okay, I won't say that anymore. 319 00:13:17,479 --> 00:13:18,999 Coconut , you. 320 00:13:19,309 --> 00:13:20,989 There are vanilla contours out there. 321 00:13:21,409 --> 00:13:22,069 I love vanilla. 322 00:13:22,069 --> 00:13:23,089 You get into the different types. 323 00:13:23,094 --> 00:13:23,239 Vanilla. 324 00:13:23,609 --> 00:13:26,149 Oh, Mel, vanilla bean, baby. 325 00:13:26,849 --> 00:13:27,199 Oh, 326 00:13:27,659 --> 00:13:28,079 yes. 327 00:13:29,029 --> 00:13:29,689 That's okay. 328 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:30,589 We're on the same page. 329 00:13:33,379 --> 00:13:35,719 . Actually, it's funny cuz my mom made coconut at cream pie last night. 330 00:13:36,109 --> 00:13:39,019 My mom lives with us and it, it very good. 331 00:13:39,409 --> 00:13:39,439 Okay, 332 00:13:39,439 --> 00:13:39,949 here's the deal. 333 00:13:39,949 --> 00:13:42,139 When I come down for the conference, I need some of that. 334 00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:42,919 Okay? 335 00:13:42,959 --> 00:13:43,359 Okay. 336 00:13:43,489 --> 00:13:45,229 You know what, I'll let her, I'll put in my order now. 337 00:13:48,019 --> 00:13:48,439 Yes. 338 00:13:48,444 --> 00:13:48,499 Yes. 339 00:13:48,499 --> 00:13:49,451 That's one of my favorites. 340 00:13:49,811 --> 00:13:49,901 Ok. 341 00:13:49,901 --> 00:13:50,171 Mom, 342 00:13:50,591 --> 00:13:53,209 anything coconut at you got me Mom loves to contribute however she can. 343 00:13:53,209 --> 00:13:54,209 So I, I. 344 00:13:55,309 --> 00:13:58,549 I'll pass that request on from scratch. 345 00:13:58,549 --> 00:13:59,539 Coconut cream pie, man. 346 00:13:59,719 --> 00:14:01,729 Oh yeah, you had me 347 00:14:01,729 --> 00:14:02,209 on coconut. 348 00:14:02,269 --> 00:14:02,629 It's all good. 349 00:14:04,219 --> 00:14:08,149 . So dy you model your life on what you call the five Fs. 350 00:14:08,389 --> 00:14:09,799 Can you share what that is and why? 351 00:14:09,820 --> 00:14:12,160 One, I love alliteration, right? 352 00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:14,250 It helps us remember stuff also. 353 00:14:14,250 --> 00:14:18,829 It sounds kind of cool , you know, So I use the 5 F's cause also it. 354 00:14:19,579 --> 00:14:22,219 I know when it comes to teaching and understanding, 355 00:14:22,219 --> 00:14:23,569 we need little tricks, right? 356 00:14:23,569 --> 00:14:26,539 Those menno minute, you know the word, I can never spell it either. 357 00:14:27,589 --> 00:14:28,459 Thank you. 358 00:14:28,789 --> 00:14:29,359 Thank you. 359 00:14:29,383 --> 00:14:33,224 Like I said, English is hard so creating these ways that we can remember things 360 00:14:33,224 --> 00:14:36,014 and reference things, but also, cuz if you can remember it, we can apply 361 00:14:36,014 --> 00:14:41,434 it, and so these five is just a simple way of giving us some structure, but 362 00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:42,754 more importantly than just structure. 363 00:14:42,754 --> 00:14:43,444 It's also direct. 364 00:14:44,554 --> 00:14:48,094 Because through clarity we gain confidence and through confidence we 365 00:14:48,094 --> 00:14:50,726 tend to take more action, procrastinate less and then we also gain more 366 00:14:50,726 --> 00:14:52,706 clarity in the act of doing the action. 367 00:14:52,706 --> 00:14:54,566 So it, it's kind of ebb and flow. 368 00:14:54,566 --> 00:15:00,146 And so here's the five x fitness, faith, family, finances, and 369 00:15:00,146 --> 00:15:01,586 an overarching roof of fun. 370 00:15:02,636 --> 00:15:07,196 And why I say these words, because when I really surmise a lot of the things that 371 00:15:07,196 --> 00:15:10,226 are most important in my life, they can fit in any one of those five buckets. 372 00:15:11,771 --> 00:15:15,401 You held up a copy of my book earlier, my book I use at home, like a house analogy. 373 00:15:15,401 --> 00:15:17,935 So just entertain this idea for a second. 374 00:15:18,265 --> 00:15:22,315 I, if you are the architect of your own home and that home was a 375 00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:26,454 representation or a metaphor for your life, Just think about the way that 376 00:15:26,454 --> 00:15:27,834 we used to draw houses as kids, right? 377 00:15:27,839 --> 00:15:28,739 Again, I'm not an artist. 378 00:15:28,739 --> 00:15:31,563 I'm not gonna draw some, Rembrandt or Michel, Anglo kind of thing. 379 00:15:31,563 --> 00:15:35,073 I'm, I'm like four, like it looks like a square with a little triangle on top. 380 00:15:35,283 --> 00:15:35,403 Stick. 381 00:15:36,093 --> 00:15:36,453 I get it. 382 00:15:36,753 --> 00:15:37,143 Thank you. 383 00:15:37,143 --> 00:15:37,443 Good. 384 00:15:37,510 --> 00:15:38,530 So we're on the same page here. 385 00:15:38,710 --> 00:15:42,790 So the four walls are each and f and then the roof is fun. 386 00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:45,550 So fitness, faith, family, and finances. 387 00:15:45,550 --> 00:15:47,740 Now here's the thing, it's all on a foundation of. 388 00:15:49,675 --> 00:15:52,525 But I look at family, obviously that's relationships that we have. 389 00:15:52,525 --> 00:15:56,579 It's that level of connection that we have in our life, that, that sense of belonging 390 00:15:56,579 --> 00:16:00,269 in certain situations as well, like factoring community under there as well. 391 00:16:01,739 --> 00:16:03,569 Also, faith is our belief systems. 392 00:16:04,259 --> 00:16:08,742 What is it that we rely on that helps us navigate the down times, pulls us 393 00:16:08,742 --> 00:16:11,962 out, provides us with that hope, that sense of faith, that sense of being. 394 00:16:12,562 --> 00:16:16,378 And I'm not talking about just secular versions, but also non secular, cuz it's 395 00:16:16,378 --> 00:16:19,978 just our own personal beliefs and our relationship with this idea of how we're 396 00:16:19,978 --> 00:16:21,448 impacting the world and living within it. 397 00:16:21,478 --> 00:16:23,488 And that's what I classify under as faith. 398 00:16:24,478 --> 00:16:25,228 Finances. 399 00:16:25,258 --> 00:16:28,628 Listen, we live in a world where you gotta be fiduciary, responsible. 400 00:16:28,628 --> 00:16:31,593 We, it's not like we're, we live in a barter system as much as I wish we did. 401 00:16:31,593 --> 00:16:35,643 We live in a world where we do have economic constraints and. 402 00:16:36,288 --> 00:16:40,128 One thing that I see affects so many families and individuals 403 00:16:40,158 --> 00:16:41,598 is stress around money. 404 00:16:43,038 --> 00:16:46,308 And so if we can learn to be more financially responsible and understand 405 00:16:46,313 --> 00:16:50,178 that it can be a great vehicle to support us and help all the other walls 406 00:16:50,178 --> 00:16:54,261 as well as that foundation and roof, well, we should make it a priority. 407 00:16:54,861 --> 00:16:58,041 But it also under finances, the way that we earn an. 408 00:16:58,084 --> 00:16:59,684 How do we generate the money? 409 00:16:59,698 --> 00:17:01,433 And so that's also being factored in there. 410 00:17:02,003 --> 00:17:03,164 And then family faith. 411 00:17:03,194 --> 00:17:07,814 Oh, fitness, fitness is the one way to directly impact that foundation of health. 412 00:17:08,654 --> 00:17:11,774 And so when I say fitness, I'm talking about the actual activities to improve 413 00:17:11,774 --> 00:17:15,764 your health and wellbeing physically, emotionally, spiritually, psychologically, 414 00:17:16,424 --> 00:17:18,554 and all that comes into fitness. 415 00:17:18,584 --> 00:17:19,634 In fitness, what is fitness? 416 00:17:19,634 --> 00:17:22,514 It's like moving our body to create a certain physical response or an adapt. 417 00:17:23,924 --> 00:17:28,253 Well, Sam can apply to being fitness financially, or to be mentally fit. 418 00:17:28,733 --> 00:17:32,273 It's doing actual activities that builds our natural resiliency. 419 00:17:33,173 --> 00:17:36,023 And then lastly, the last step is the overarching roof of fun. 420 00:17:36,713 --> 00:17:37,403 Because you know what? 421 00:17:37,408 --> 00:17:40,213 If you're smiling every day, there's room for improvement. 422 00:17:40,763 --> 00:17:41,123 All right. 423 00:17:41,123 --> 00:17:44,822 That's bottom line, . And so that's my sort of my invitation 424 00:17:44,822 --> 00:17:46,652 to people is envision your house. 425 00:17:46,772 --> 00:17:48,632 What are your top values? 426 00:17:48,647 --> 00:17:52,847 And use that as the framework to envision, Okay, this is the life I'm building. 427 00:17:53,657 --> 00:17:57,857 I need to focus on my fitness wall right now because I think I got termites 428 00:17:58,397 --> 00:18:01,037 and if I tornado comes through, it's gonna knock that wall down and my 429 00:18:01,037 --> 00:18:02,447 house is not gonna look so good. 430 00:18:02,807 --> 00:18:04,007 So I need to reinforce that. 431 00:18:05,072 --> 00:18:07,112 Which also it has to be reinforced cuz of the foundation. 432 00:18:07,117 --> 00:18:08,912 So that's sort of how I play with that metaphor. 433 00:18:09,002 --> 00:18:12,662 It all opens up a lot of doors to better understand this relationship 434 00:18:12,667 --> 00:18:15,435 that we have with our values, but also what are we doing to reinforce 435 00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:17,395 those and grow them and shift them. 436 00:18:17,395 --> 00:18:20,709 I guess I, I went into this because I want you to understand who Dai 437 00:18:20,714 --> 00:18:23,089 is and where he's coming for from. 438 00:18:23,089 --> 00:18:26,679 As we go into the next half of this conversation, you needed 439 00:18:26,679 --> 00:18:28,359 to have that foundation of who. 440 00:18:29,049 --> 00:18:31,059 Who's talking to you and where this is coming from. 441 00:18:31,419 --> 00:18:34,129 And for all of you guys listening on the podcast we've talked about 442 00:18:34,129 --> 00:18:37,589 it in passing the D'S book, the Whole Life Fitness Manifesto. 443 00:18:37,589 --> 00:18:40,510 If you're on the video version, you saw me hold it up, but it's the Diamond 444 00:18:40,510 --> 00:18:42,940 Wells Whole Life Fitness manifesto. 445 00:18:43,510 --> 00:18:46,660 You will have links to that in the show notes and in the description 446 00:18:46,660 --> 00:18:49,630 below, you'll also be able to find out my website afterwards. 447 00:18:49,630 --> 00:18:52,150 But I wanted you guys to know that's the book we're talking. 448 00:18:52,930 --> 00:18:54,400 I'm not gonna leave you in the dark. 449 00:18:54,610 --> 00:18:56,980 There will be a link to D's book so that way you guys can find 450 00:18:56,980 --> 00:18:58,240 it since we keep referencing it. 451 00:18:59,020 --> 00:19:02,110 But I wanted to know who he was and get into that. 452 00:19:02,110 --> 00:19:07,210 Before we step into the next piece of this conversation, so dive before we get 453 00:19:07,210 --> 00:19:13,464 into the next part of this conversation, what are two books that just to you are 454 00:19:13,464 --> 00:19:14,814 life changing books that you need to read? 455 00:19:15,414 --> 00:19:15,744 Okay. 456 00:19:15,744 --> 00:19:17,625 The first one's the Big Leap by Gay Hendrick. 457 00:19:18,375 --> 00:19:21,600 And just a phenomenal I absolutely just love it. 458 00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:25,956 It's all about limiting beliefs and he talks about glass ceilings that we 459 00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:30,760 put over our heads, and just how this self-sabotage also shows up in our life. 460 00:19:31,450 --> 00:19:34,360 And cuz once you understand that framework and you can start to see how 461 00:19:34,360 --> 00:19:38,110 it shows up, you can start to change it and make shifts and change it. 462 00:19:38,110 --> 00:19:39,650 So the big leap is one. 463 00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:42,080 Second to that would be a book I referenced earlier, which is 464 00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:44,120 Man's Search for Meaning by Dr. 465 00:19:44,120 --> 00:19:44,660 Victor Frank. 466 00:19:46,145 --> 00:19:47,165 It's super impactful. 467 00:19:47,165 --> 00:19:49,835 You have to understand, just to give some context with people then, just 468 00:19:49,835 --> 00:19:53,124 cause I want you to understand the impact that this book has made on the world. 469 00:19:53,124 --> 00:19:56,268 But this doctor who was a psychologist and this is during 470 00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:58,652 pre World War II and he is German. 471 00:19:59,252 --> 00:20:01,075 But a Jewish, German individual. 472 00:20:01,075 --> 00:20:04,663 So him and his entire family living in Germany there and the Nazis, just 473 00:20:04,663 --> 00:20:09,073 awful, the persecution that they did, but his entire family and friends, 474 00:20:09,073 --> 00:20:12,943 his communities were all round up and sent to various concentration camps. 475 00:20:13,513 --> 00:20:15,403 He ended up being in three or four of them. 476 00:20:15,463 --> 00:20:19,555 He actually was in Auschwitz as well, but because of his phy being a physician 477 00:20:19,555 --> 00:20:23,065 background, they allowed him to stay on because he would then be working. 478 00:20:23,445 --> 00:20:26,955 Within the camp, which was also very challenging for him, but long 479 00:20:26,955 --> 00:20:30,495 and shorter, the first half is just re recounting those experiences. 480 00:20:30,765 --> 00:20:36,285 And, but as a psychologist being able to observe how people were acting, reacting, 481 00:20:36,975 --> 00:20:42,405 he was able to put it into a certain context that just is so, uh, you know, 482 00:20:42,555 --> 00:20:46,236 cuz if, I hope we never see anything like that again in the world, And it 483 00:20:46,236 --> 00:20:48,016 just, it shook me when I read that book. 484 00:20:48,736 --> 00:20:49,156 But here's the. 485 00:20:50,431 --> 00:20:51,361 In the second half. 486 00:20:51,721 --> 00:20:54,871 He takes a lot of what he unpacked as he ultimately, and it survived. 487 00:20:55,111 --> 00:20:56,371 He lost his entire family. 488 00:20:57,211 --> 00:21:01,921 If there's any reason to give up on life and that level of decimation in 489 00:21:01,921 --> 00:21:05,611 one's life, I mean, and yet to come out of it and still remain positive and be 490 00:21:05,616 --> 00:21:08,791 able to then take what he learned and apply it in a way to change the world. 491 00:21:08,851 --> 00:21:11,681 I mean, gosh, that is inspiring in my. 492 00:21:12,451 --> 00:21:13,291 The whole second half. 493 00:21:13,291 --> 00:21:17,371 He talks about this idea of aligning with purpose in our lives and really that idea 494 00:21:17,371 --> 00:21:20,731 of discovering the meaning for our lives, the why, if you will, in some cases. 495 00:21:20,772 --> 00:21:24,777 And outta that came an entire psychological system called Logotherapy. 496 00:21:24,802 --> 00:21:28,433 And so I know I've spoken quite a bit on this book, but I just, I got to give 497 00:21:28,438 --> 00:21:31,913 people some perspective and context on it cuz when you read it, it is just, wow. 498 00:21:32,233 --> 00:21:32,733 So, WOW! 499 00:21:33,403 --> 00:21:36,663 And so those you worlds though, those are the two that came to mind. 500 00:21:36,663 --> 00:21:39,690 Like it's, I think it should be required reading as far as I'm concerned. 501 00:21:39,708 --> 00:21:42,637 Especially just because, those, that level of just. 502 00:21:43,702 --> 00:21:45,482 Think what the Nazis did is just, un-called for. 503 00:21:45,482 --> 00:21:46,206 It's just absolutely. 504 00:21:46,282 --> 00:21:49,192 And I don't think we reference that enough, like mistakes happen. 505 00:21:49,192 --> 00:21:51,482 We, I mean, what's happening in the Ukraine right now is just awful, 506 00:21:51,482 --> 00:21:55,502 and I'm just amazed that we're as advanced as we are as a human species, 507 00:21:55,502 --> 00:21:57,214 yet we still have these tendencies. 508 00:21:57,229 --> 00:21:58,757 I'm just like, it blows my mind, blows my mind. 509 00:21:59,972 --> 00:22:00,272 Hey guys. 510 00:22:00,272 --> 00:22:02,492 We'll have leaks for those books as well because a good book 511 00:22:02,492 --> 00:22:03,632 really does change your life. 512 00:22:04,202 --> 00:22:07,622 We're huge advocates of reading and I love audio books and stuff. 513 00:22:08,462 --> 00:22:12,482 Me read even more , so we'll have links to those books as well 514 00:22:12,482 --> 00:22:13,712 in the show notes for you guys. 515 00:22:14,762 --> 00:22:17,364 If Dai says they're great books, guys they're probably fabulous 516 00:22:17,364 --> 00:22:19,704 books, so check those out. 517 00:22:20,004 --> 00:22:22,404 Now we're enroll to our sponsor and we'll be right back and we're 518 00:22:22,409 --> 00:22:26,154 gonna dig into vulnerability and change and how it can make. 519 00:22:27,324 --> 00:22:28,494 And to the best part of your life. 520 00:22:29,484 --> 00:22:30,904 So who we are back with more for Dai. 521 00:22:32,304 --> 00:22:37,854 I'm calling on all men right now to stand up and stand against this horrific crime. 522 00:22:38,274 --> 00:22:42,144 It is estimated over 300,000 children are being sex trafficked in the 523 00:22:42,144 --> 00:22:44,274 United States alone every single day. 524 00:22:44,694 --> 00:22:46,134 I want you to get on your social media. 525 00:22:46,134 --> 00:22:50,274 I want you to follow savinginnocence.org or fightforme.net. 526 00:22:50,814 --> 00:22:52,704 Both these charities are working to. 527 00:22:53,964 --> 00:22:56,694 Child trafficking in the United States and abroad. 528 00:22:57,204 --> 00:23:03,084 You can donate at www.thefallibleman.com/shop and bu 529 00:23:03,084 --> 00:23:08,164 your en human trafficking merchandise and all proceeds will be given 530 00:23:08,164 --> 00:23:10,754 indefinitely to savinginnocence.org. 531 00:23:11,064 --> 00:23:15,834 You can also go to www.savinginnocence.org/donate 532 00:23:15,834 --> 00:23:17,364 and donate directly to saving. 533 00:23:18,699 --> 00:23:22,749 Men, it is time for us to fight and stop this horrible thing 534 00:23:22,749 --> 00:23:23,969 known as human trafficking. 535 00:23:24,459 --> 00:23:25,119 Guys, welcome back. 536 00:23:25,119 --> 00:23:29,139 We're here with Dai Manuel discussing vulnerability and men and how to be a 537 00:23:29,139 --> 00:23:31,929 champion for change and not a victim, so you can live your best life. 538 00:23:32,229 --> 00:23:34,389 And I know that's a mouthful and lot to cover, but I promise 539 00:23:34,394 --> 00:23:35,499 we're gonna tie it all together. 540 00:23:35,849 --> 00:23:36,109 Dai. 541 00:23:36,134 --> 00:23:39,009 What purchase of a hundred dollars or less did you make in last year that's 542 00:23:39,289 --> 00:23:40,389 had the biggest impact on your life? 543 00:23:41,379 --> 00:23:42,639 That's a solid question. 544 00:23:44,439 --> 00:23:44,859 Hmm. 545 00:23:46,209 --> 00:23:46,719 Oh no. 546 00:23:46,719 --> 00:23:48,099 Cause it's a hundred dollars less. 547 00:23:48,309 --> 00:23:49,299 Well, let's see. 548 00:23:49,749 --> 00:23:50,979 Oh man, this is tough. 549 00:23:51,012 --> 00:23:51,934 I should know this. 550 00:23:52,144 --> 00:23:53,914 And I'm like, I don't know what I would say. 551 00:23:54,334 --> 00:23:57,930 Well, you know what I think if I actually look at my last 12 months, the thing 552 00:23:57,930 --> 00:24:00,660 that's made the biggest difference is my new pair of running shoes. 553 00:24:00,707 --> 00:24:05,022 I know it sounds funny, but when I get a new pair of shoes, I feel 554 00:24:05,022 --> 00:24:06,582 inspired and motivated to use them. 555 00:24:06,772 --> 00:24:07,382 Mm-hmm. 556 00:24:08,112 --> 00:24:09,762 and this last pair of shoes, I got it. 557 00:24:09,762 --> 00:24:10,542 It's just been great. 558 00:24:10,565 --> 00:24:11,588 I just found that with. 559 00:24:12,458 --> 00:24:15,218 Commitment to the shoes also got recommitted to me doing 560 00:24:15,218 --> 00:24:16,008 some things for my health. 561 00:24:16,038 --> 00:24:19,228 Got back into walking regularly, even to cycling regularly. 562 00:24:19,228 --> 00:24:22,560 They just, it's amazing how that one little thing affected my perspective on 563 00:24:22,565 --> 00:24:27,210 myself, but also my psychology around just getting back to prioritizing my health. 564 00:24:27,248 --> 00:24:30,041 To be fair, that is honestly, in the last 12 months, the one thing 565 00:24:30,041 --> 00:24:33,461 that I used like all the time, and it was under a hundred bucks. 566 00:24:33,611 --> 00:24:34,371 So there you. 567 00:24:34,371 --> 00:24:35,703 Sarah wants to know cuz she's a runner. 568 00:24:35,703 --> 00:24:36,592 So what kinda shoes? 569 00:24:36,594 --> 00:24:40,283 I should qualify when I say I'm a runner, I'm not I'm a Sprinter 570 00:24:42,143 --> 00:24:44,189 and they're Nikes Nike Freeze. 571 00:24:44,197 --> 00:24:46,886 So I, I like Flat Souls, like, zero point shoes. 572 00:24:46,891 --> 00:24:50,267 So there's no, they're, there's, you know, it's, you might as well 573 00:24:50,267 --> 00:24:51,767 be running almost bare feet, right? 574 00:24:51,797 --> 00:24:51,857 Yeah. 575 00:24:51,885 --> 00:24:53,557 I prefer that more natural feel. 576 00:24:53,626 --> 00:24:54,886 So yeah they've been really good. 577 00:24:54,976 --> 00:24:55,066 I. 578 00:24:55,996 --> 00:24:56,296 Okay. 579 00:24:56,626 --> 00:24:59,266 I actually was gonna guess that you were a sprinter more than a long distance runner. 580 00:24:59,536 --> 00:24:59,686 Yeah. 581 00:25:01,276 --> 00:25:03,346 . Ok, Wait my body tip. 582 00:25:03,346 --> 00:25:03,796 Give away 583 00:25:04,626 --> 00:25:09,878 it know since I've actually met you face to face and you shape 584 00:25:11,168 --> 00:25:12,698 reminded me much work I gotta do. 585 00:25:13,198 --> 00:25:17,798 I also know enough about exercise sciences like that. 586 00:25:17,798 --> 00:25:18,638 That's a sprinting body. 587 00:25:18,638 --> 00:25:20,638 That's not a, that, that's not a long distance 588 00:25:20,643 --> 00:25:20,828 runner. 589 00:25:21,128 --> 00:25:22,438 No, no. 590 00:25:22,448 --> 00:25:23,665 It's no distance here, man. 591 00:25:23,665 --> 00:25:26,156 I can do it if I have to, but I only do it on mud runs. 592 00:25:26,156 --> 00:25:27,006 That's the only I can do it. 593 00:25:27,016 --> 00:25:30,339 We could get into a whole nother ball on will wax on that one, but we'll 594 00:25:30,729 --> 00:25:32,049 say that for another conversation. 595 00:25:32,409 --> 00:25:32,779 Awesome. 596 00:25:32,783 --> 00:25:34,248 We can go down that rabbit hole for sure. 597 00:25:35,388 --> 00:25:38,268 When you speak about vulnerability, most men are automatically gonna 598 00:25:38,268 --> 00:25:40,328 recoil like a vampire in sunlight. 599 00:25:40,328 --> 00:25:44,318 We hear, we heard hear vulnerability men are like you, right? 600 00:25:44,348 --> 00:25:47,618 They're just now stick with us guys, okay? 601 00:25:47,738 --> 00:25:49,748 That's not where we're going. 602 00:25:50,258 --> 00:25:53,468 So let's define what you're suggesting here when you talk about 603 00:25:54,368 --> 00:25:55,464 learning to be vulnerable. 604 00:25:55,493 --> 00:25:58,101 Thanks and listen I get it guys. 605 00:25:58,161 --> 00:25:58,843 I was there. 606 00:25:58,893 --> 00:26:00,903 , you tell me the word vulnerable and vulnerability. 607 00:26:00,903 --> 00:26:01,603 I think weak. 608 00:26:01,603 --> 00:26:03,375 I think, No, you don't do that. 609 00:26:03,375 --> 00:26:04,365 You don't wanna be vulnerable. 610 00:26:04,365 --> 00:26:08,007 You wanna be impetu, rateable, you wanna be bulletproof and 611 00:26:08,627 --> 00:26:10,227 resilient to keep everything abey. 612 00:26:10,232 --> 00:26:10,617 Right? 613 00:26:10,671 --> 00:26:11,451 But here's the thing. 614 00:26:11,631 --> 00:26:13,971 If that's the perspective in that relationship you have with 615 00:26:13,971 --> 00:26:16,463 the idea of being vulnerable I just invite you to ask yourself. 616 00:26:18,263 --> 00:26:22,163 What brought about that belief system, that relationship to this understanding 617 00:26:22,223 --> 00:26:23,783 of what it means to be vulnerable. 618 00:26:24,353 --> 00:26:28,185 Because I think if you look and this is actually a testament to what we spoke 619 00:26:28,185 --> 00:26:32,265 about at the Phoenix Conference, Brent was, if you remember, there's only two 620 00:26:32,265 --> 00:26:35,625 way you know, the, the brain is not wired to be happy, but it is wired to 621 00:26:35,625 --> 00:26:40,205 learn and what's the most effective ways of learning, modeling, and me. 622 00:26:41,250 --> 00:26:43,680 And I still remember that was the most significant piece I took away 623 00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:45,060 from the conference because it's true. 624 00:26:45,090 --> 00:26:47,488 And being a fan of neuroscience I relate to that. 625 00:26:48,018 --> 00:26:52,608 And here's the thing, our entire life is a culmination of experiences 626 00:26:52,608 --> 00:26:54,841 and interactions and consumption. 627 00:26:54,852 --> 00:26:57,547 And it formulates this perspective that we have not only on ourselves 628 00:26:57,547 --> 00:27:00,127 in the world that we live in, and. 629 00:27:01,132 --> 00:27:03,862 There's probably something in there that created a negative 630 00:27:03,862 --> 00:27:05,932 idea of what vulnerable is. 631 00:27:06,112 --> 00:27:09,022 Maybe it's a poor first experience that we had where me, we went out on 632 00:27:09,022 --> 00:27:12,292 a limb, expressed how we were really feeling about something, and somebody 633 00:27:12,297 --> 00:27:17,602 turned around and used it against us, made fun of us, degraded us. 634 00:27:18,532 --> 00:27:19,162 Fair enough. 635 00:27:19,432 --> 00:27:20,302 You have an experience like that. 636 00:27:20,302 --> 00:27:22,342 It's easy to say, I'm not gonna be vulnerable again. 637 00:27:23,032 --> 00:27:25,912 And then you get around a bunch of other guys that all have the same perspective. 638 00:27:26,242 --> 00:27:27,742 Of course, you just reinforce the. 639 00:27:28,927 --> 00:27:31,669 So we have to look at who are we modeling in our life and start to ask 640 00:27:31,739 --> 00:27:34,962 are those the best habits, and best belief systems, do they really serve me? 641 00:27:36,132 --> 00:27:38,982 I go back 13 years ago, the most significant change 642 00:27:38,982 --> 00:27:39,912 I've ever made in my life. 643 00:27:40,722 --> 00:27:43,730 And it all started and really I was only able to navigate it as 644 00:27:43,730 --> 00:27:46,880 well as I did because I was able to get vulnerable with my life. 645 00:27:48,230 --> 00:27:50,705 I was able to open up and, putting this, We'd already been 646 00:27:50,705 --> 00:27:51,815 together at 10 years at this. 647 00:27:52,520 --> 00:27:55,190 And to be honest, I don't think I was ever truly vulnerable with her. 648 00:27:55,190 --> 00:27:58,970 Allowed her to see me for who I really was and how scared I 649 00:27:58,970 --> 00:28:01,550 was and how depressed I was. 650 00:28:02,330 --> 00:28:04,220 Cause I was very good at putting on a show. 651 00:28:05,090 --> 00:28:07,820 I was very good living the Instagram filter. 652 00:28:08,390 --> 00:28:08,816 . Okay. 653 00:28:08,886 --> 00:28:09,756 I was just very good at that. 654 00:28:10,116 --> 00:28:14,526 I was an actor in a way, and yet when things came crashing down 655 00:28:14,526 --> 00:28:17,346 and life became so unruly and my alcohol consumption got weird to. 656 00:28:17,380 --> 00:28:18,190 asked me a question. 657 00:28:18,195 --> 00:28:20,140 She said, Dai, are you being the type of man that you would 658 00:28:20,140 --> 00:28:21,490 want to marry your daughters? 659 00:28:23,410 --> 00:28:26,920 That question shifted everything because I realized in the 660 00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:28,180 moment I couldn't defend myself. 661 00:28:28,180 --> 00:28:31,570 I had nothing to defend to justify the way I was. 662 00:28:32,290 --> 00:28:35,959 And that opened up this emptiness for me this pit, if you will. 663 00:28:37,129 --> 00:28:39,921 And I knew I had to cross that chasm to be able to start to 664 00:28:39,921 --> 00:28:42,531 heal, start to change, start to be more the man I always wanted to. 665 00:28:43,341 --> 00:28:48,441 And not this person that I was running away from and I needed to be able to 666 00:28:48,441 --> 00:28:51,741 open up and express that to my wife or else she wouldn't understand. 667 00:28:51,741 --> 00:28:52,791 She wouldn't be able to support me. 668 00:28:52,791 --> 00:28:55,461 And to be fair, I don't think we would've endured and stayed together 669 00:28:56,061 --> 00:28:57,111 cuz she was at her wits end. 670 00:28:58,791 --> 00:28:59,511 So I was vulnerable. 671 00:28:59,571 --> 00:29:02,201 I opened up about everything I let it all out. 672 00:29:03,401 --> 00:29:06,371 And it was incredible how cathartic that was. 673 00:29:06,371 --> 00:29:08,231 But also to see who in her eyes. 674 00:29:10,946 --> 00:29:15,476 She saw in me, me, and it was empathetic, but it was also loving 675 00:29:15,536 --> 00:29:19,046 and caring and saying, just with their eyes, it's gonna be okay. 676 00:29:19,076 --> 00:29:19,796 We got this. 677 00:29:21,026 --> 00:29:24,056 In that sense of emotion, 13 year journey I've been on ever since, and 678 00:29:24,296 --> 00:29:27,866 if we think about vulnerability as a skill, skill that can be developed, 679 00:29:29,036 --> 00:29:32,696 our relationship with the word becomes healthier, but the what it opens up 680 00:29:32,701 --> 00:29:37,428 for us up opens up for us as far as a life of possibility and opportunity. 681 00:29:38,148 --> 00:29:38,728 It's in. 682 00:29:38,751 --> 00:29:41,781 And so I, I invite people, if you want more on this, just my TEDx talk, I go 683 00:29:41,781 --> 00:29:44,422 into the glory details and all that story. 684 00:29:44,422 --> 00:29:47,822 But it was for me being able to open up with somebody and other people now 685 00:29:47,822 --> 00:29:53,672 other men in doing so, cuz someone's gotta go first, someone's gotta go first. 686 00:29:53,822 --> 00:29:56,792 But in going first, whoever that person might be, you are not gonna 687 00:29:56,792 --> 00:29:58,022 give permission to others to open up. 688 00:29:59,192 --> 00:30:01,052 And that is the beautiful thing about vulnerability. 689 00:30:01,052 --> 00:30:05,226 It takes someone to go first, but it can shift the mood and the tone for all 690 00:30:05,226 --> 00:30:06,546 your interactions with other people. 691 00:30:06,546 --> 00:30:08,136 But they have to, They have to see it. 692 00:30:08,166 --> 00:30:09,516 Cuz you have to realize they might be like us. 693 00:30:09,816 --> 00:30:13,086 Their circles of influence are really negative on vulnerability. 694 00:30:13,446 --> 00:30:16,176 That's why we clam up, we retract, we run away. 695 00:30:16,536 --> 00:30:18,516 We avoid dealing with that stuff. 696 00:30:19,746 --> 00:30:22,296 We only limit our potential and happiness, fulfillment, and 697 00:30:22,296 --> 00:30:23,706 joy in our life if we do so. 698 00:30:23,706 --> 00:30:24,666 So that's it. 699 00:30:24,666 --> 00:30:25,776 That's what I wanna say on vulnerability. 700 00:30:25,776 --> 00:30:28,506 I know we could talk about this for an hour or two hours or 10 701 00:30:28,506 --> 00:30:31,776 hours, or be like Brene Brown and make an entire business out of it. 702 00:30:32,106 --> 00:30:38,449 But all I can say is please just warm up to just having more conversations or 703 00:30:38,449 --> 00:30:40,009 maybe just experimenting a little bit. 704 00:30:40,009 --> 00:30:43,514 And Brent, I gotta commend you cuz you have a group, a community, 705 00:30:43,514 --> 00:30:45,104 a tribe if you will, that is. 706 00:30:46,124 --> 00:30:48,414 For men to practice these skills developments. 707 00:30:48,441 --> 00:30:51,651 Like you, you've created that and I've witnessed that at the Phoenix. 708 00:30:51,921 --> 00:30:54,351 Some of those conversations that happened in between speakers. 709 00:30:54,471 --> 00:30:55,101 Oh my gosh. 710 00:30:55,971 --> 00:31:01,101 Like life changing, but also wow, the depth of sharing some of those guys did. 711 00:31:01,671 --> 00:31:04,131 That only happened because we had other people willing to 712 00:31:04,131 --> 00:31:05,581 be vulnerable from the stage. 713 00:31:05,581 --> 00:31:08,653 You yourself opening up with some of your personal stories and 714 00:31:08,653 --> 00:31:13,293 overcoming big obstacles that allowed everybody else there to do the. 715 00:31:13,948 --> 00:31:16,648 Because you said it's safe, it's okay. 716 00:31:17,038 --> 00:31:19,318 And hey, we're all, we're all here together, you know? 717 00:31:19,438 --> 00:31:20,278 So, yeah. 718 00:31:20,368 --> 00:31:22,425 Anyways that's my bit on vulnerability for now. 719 00:31:23,055 --> 00:31:26,499 And guys, we're not suggesting you, you break down and sob 720 00:31:26,499 --> 00:31:28,869 uncontrollably and fall apart. 721 00:31:28,869 --> 00:31:33,159 Like some, That's not what we're talking about when he's talking 722 00:31:33,159 --> 00:31:34,629 about being vulnerable to his life. 723 00:31:35,229 --> 00:31:39,609 When he's talking about being vulnerable, other men, that's not what we're. 724 00:31:41,859 --> 00:31:45,489 We're talking about having honest conversations cuz none of us are perfect. 725 00:31:46,429 --> 00:31:47,949 Brent, You know, what's the craziest thing? 726 00:31:48,099 --> 00:31:51,874 When I started being vulnerable and I remember I was, we started 727 00:31:51,874 --> 00:31:54,244 facilitating these men's groups and we come together every Monday night 728 00:31:54,244 --> 00:31:55,564 to have dinner and conversation. 729 00:31:55,564 --> 00:31:58,008 And I remember when we started opening up and we started to 730 00:31:58,008 --> 00:31:59,358 implement the hand gestures. 731 00:32:00,198 --> 00:32:02,748 And one gesture we had is just guys putting up their hand like that or 732 00:32:02,753 --> 00:32:05,678 putting it on the table to just motion. 733 00:32:06,218 --> 00:32:07,748 That they get it, They empathize. 734 00:32:07,748 --> 00:32:12,728 But also I've been there and the coolest thing happens as the guy's opening up. 735 00:32:12,788 --> 00:32:15,638 All of a sudden I would see like five, six other guys put their hands on the 736 00:32:15,638 --> 00:32:20,040 table or put their hands up to communicate that I'm there too, or I've been there. 737 00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:23,478 It's wonderful when we start to realize that man, all this suffering that I'm 738 00:32:23,478 --> 00:32:27,738 wallowing in believing that nobody gets me, no one will understand me, 739 00:32:27,738 --> 00:32:29,058 so I gotta keep it all bottled up. 740 00:32:29,718 --> 00:32:31,938 As soon as you open up, you start to realize a lot of the people around. 741 00:32:32,643 --> 00:32:36,393 You're dealing with this exact same stuff, . It's like all these smokes. 742 00:32:36,393 --> 00:32:39,121 If I only opened up about this like a long time ago I think I would've worked 743 00:32:39,121 --> 00:32:41,221 through it because we can do it together. 744 00:32:41,731 --> 00:32:44,071 As the African proverb goes, You wanna go far, go together, 745 00:32:44,071 --> 00:32:45,431 You wanna go faster, go along. 746 00:32:45,461 --> 00:32:46,451 But I don't know. 747 00:32:46,451 --> 00:32:47,351 I wanna go far, man. 748 00:32:47,651 --> 00:32:50,021 I wanna go far, guys. 749 00:32:50,231 --> 00:32:54,071 And today we're not gonna have time to dive into change because I think I, and 750 00:32:54,071 --> 00:32:56,381 I can go for a deep, long dive on this. 751 00:32:57,101 --> 00:33:01,541 So you guys who are listening, If you wanna hear Di and I go into just 752 00:33:01,541 --> 00:33:06,161 a deep dive on change and why is not bad and how you can champion that in 753 00:33:06,161 --> 00:33:09,491 your life info@thefallibleman.com. 754 00:33:09,791 --> 00:33:11,051 I'm at the fallible man.com. 755 00:33:11,351 --> 00:33:13,511 I'm at the fall, man, pretty much everywhere. 756 00:33:14,081 --> 00:33:18,521 Comment on the show, let me know and I will sync back up with 757 00:33:18,551 --> 00:33:22,901 I and we will take this into a part two specifically on change. 758 00:33:24,641 --> 00:33:28,481 Three steps that Maine can take right now, walking away from this conversation 759 00:33:28,571 --> 00:33:29,681 to start changing their lives. 760 00:33:29,739 --> 00:33:31,269 First of all, take control of your health. 761 00:33:32,169 --> 00:33:35,949 Recognize it's the foundation upon which everything is built, and all I invite 762 00:33:35,949 --> 00:33:39,729 you to do is take one or two actions that start to reinforce that foundation. 763 00:33:40,119 --> 00:33:43,479 The simplest two actions, I would say to start with, start consuming 764 00:33:43,479 --> 00:33:47,349 a lot more water, minimum three liters a day, and start walking 765 00:33:47,354 --> 00:33:48,849 every day for at least 30 to 45. 766 00:33:49,749 --> 00:33:50,169 That's it. 767 00:33:50,409 --> 00:33:51,879 Do those two things. 768 00:33:52,539 --> 00:33:56,139 Now, if you wanna add one more thing to us, cuz we said three things, Brent. 769 00:33:56,199 --> 00:33:57,159 So that would be number one. 770 00:33:57,219 --> 00:34:00,159 Number two would be start looking at what you're feeding your mind with. 771 00:34:01,119 --> 00:34:03,249 Are you listening to inspiring podcasts like this one? 772 00:34:03,609 --> 00:34:05,929 Or are you watching a lot of movies in sitcoms? 773 00:34:05,929 --> 00:34:06,559 I'm not judging. 774 00:34:06,559 --> 00:34:07,609 I think there's a place for that. 775 00:34:07,609 --> 00:34:11,569 We all need a little bit of humor in our lives, but if that is all you're 776 00:34:11,569 --> 00:34:14,419 listening to, you gotta realize that influences your perspective. 777 00:34:14,599 --> 00:34:17,119 Especially if you're someone that maybe watches a lot of the news. 778 00:34:17,124 --> 00:34:17,869 I mean, come. 779 00:34:18,604 --> 00:34:20,074 You can't help but look at the feeds. 780 00:34:20,074 --> 00:34:20,894 It's negative. 781 00:34:21,544 --> 00:34:24,544 How do you think you're gonna have an outlook on life that's positive of all 782 00:34:24,544 --> 00:34:26,734 you reinforce in your mind is negative? 783 00:34:27,214 --> 00:34:29,044 So start to look at what you're feeding your mind. 784 00:34:29,134 --> 00:34:32,494 Here's a little tip, if you wanna cascade things, you're going to listen 785 00:34:32,494 --> 00:34:35,194 to something inspiring while you're doing your walking and drinking your water. 786 00:34:35,314 --> 00:34:35,614 Okay? 787 00:34:36,694 --> 00:34:36,814 Amen. 788 00:34:36,814 --> 00:34:37,534 Number three, 789 00:34:37,774 --> 00:34:38,164 Sorry. 790 00:34:38,494 --> 00:34:39,215 Amen to that. 791 00:34:39,334 --> 00:34:39,814 Yeah, 792 00:34:39,814 --> 00:34:40,234 Yeah, right. 793 00:34:40,234 --> 00:34:40,624 It's easy. 794 00:34:40,624 --> 00:34:45,013 Yeah, we, there's not a matter of time, I can just do my audible . Me too. 795 00:34:45,073 --> 00:34:46,063 That's exactly what I do. 796 00:34:46,063 --> 00:34:46,647 And then number. 797 00:34:47,847 --> 00:34:48,117 All right. 798 00:34:48,117 --> 00:34:50,767 Number three, What would be the most impactful thing? 799 00:34:50,767 --> 00:34:54,259 I think it's finding a community to belong with, that really is critical in 800 00:34:54,259 --> 00:34:58,619 all of our development, but also in just in having quality of life is finding a 801 00:34:58,619 --> 00:35:01,919 community, not just to join, not like Face Group where I'm in a hundred groups. 802 00:35:02,189 --> 00:35:02,579 No. 803 00:35:03,179 --> 00:35:05,849 I want you to find a place that you are like, Man, I'm 804 00:35:05,849 --> 00:35:07,799 here and I feel like I belong. 805 00:35:08,864 --> 00:35:13,869 That sense of belonging is so powerful in our lives and grounding and also at 806 00:35:13,869 --> 00:35:15,219 the same time, inspiring and motivating. 807 00:35:15,909 --> 00:35:19,779 Find that, and if you can't find it, create it . So those would be 808 00:35:19,784 --> 00:35:22,299 the three things I would recommend if you do those things first. 809 00:35:22,599 --> 00:35:23,529 Holy smokes. 810 00:35:23,829 --> 00:35:26,272 Watch out in a matter of days, you'll already notice the difference. 811 00:35:28,492 --> 00:35:29,512 Where's the best place people will? 812 00:35:31,137 --> 00:35:31,337 Anywhere? 813 00:35:31,342 --> 00:35:34,567 No, uh uh, Dai Manuel if you can spell my name, you can find me 814 00:35:34,567 --> 00:35:38,704 on any social platform or go to Daimanuel.com and just shoot me a note. 815 00:35:38,764 --> 00:35:41,866 Say, Hey, I heard you and Brent talking, and hey, this is how 816 00:35:41,866 --> 00:35:42,896 much water I drink in a day. 817 00:35:42,896 --> 00:35:44,230 And also I'm gonna throw this out there. 818 00:35:44,230 --> 00:35:47,770 If you reach out to me and you talk ab you mention the, the conversation 819 00:35:47,770 --> 00:35:48,910 that Brent and I had today. 820 00:35:49,720 --> 00:35:51,730 I will send you a free digital copy of my book. 821 00:35:51,940 --> 00:35:52,720 I can't send you a print. 822 00:35:53,500 --> 00:35:56,538 One of my publisher wouldn't like that and my wife but I will 823 00:35:56,538 --> 00:35:58,068 send you a digital copy of it. 824 00:35:58,073 --> 00:36:00,138 Neat pub version or just a pdf. 825 00:36:00,138 --> 00:36:03,974 But so that's my invitation for someone to take action and get started. 826 00:36:04,274 --> 00:36:05,504 So, uh, take me up on it. 827 00:36:06,674 --> 00:36:07,034 All right, 828 00:36:07,634 --> 00:36:13,184 guys, like I said, if you want us to do a part two, focus on change, let us know. 829 00:36:13,724 --> 00:36:14,144 Sound. 830 00:36:15,059 --> 00:36:19,919 Whether you're a regular fan of Dai or you're a regular infallible nation, sound 831 00:36:19,919 --> 00:36:22,029 off, let us know and we'll make it happen. 832 00:36:22,029 --> 00:36:23,176 I love working with this guy. 833 00:36:23,176 --> 00:36:26,260 I can't wait to have him back for our second year of the 834 00:36:26,260 --> 00:36:27,550 Phoenix coming up in February. 835 00:36:27,550 --> 00:36:31,000 And if you enjoyed this, come meet Dai in person in February 836 00:36:31,030 --> 00:36:32,140 at the Phoenix Conference. 837 00:36:32,164 --> 00:36:35,523 Guys he's, he bounces around like a gazelle. 838 00:36:35,523 --> 00:36:40,046 Dude, I jealous of your energy during the conference, but I meet him. 839 00:36:40,051 --> 00:36:43,496 He's even more bubbly person and he's great hanging out. 840 00:36:43,766 --> 00:36:48,356 We have so much fun guys as always, be better tomorrow because we what you do 841 00:36:48,356 --> 00:36:50,066 today and we'll see on the next one. 842 00:36:50,936 --> 00:36:53,426 This has been the Fable Man Podcast. 843 00:36:54,026 --> 00:36:56,936 Your home for everything, man, husband, and. 844 00:36:58,196 --> 00:37:00,506 Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss a show. 845 00:37:01,376 --> 00:37:07,676 Head over to www.thefallibleman.com for more content and get 846 00:37:07,676 --> 00:37:09,176 your own Fallible man gear.

Dai ManuelProfile Photo

Dai Manuel

I'm a Dad • Dating My Wife • Lifestyle Business Mentor & High-Performance Life Coach • Author & #Tedx Speaker

My passion is to engage and challenge people in living healthy, more active lifestyles. With increasing obesity rates and a lack of focus and education on preventive medicine, our country is facing a health epidemic. The solution starts with parents modeling a healthy active lifestyle for their children to follow.