Uncover the Sneaky Barrier Sabotaging Your Success

Invisible Roadblocks: Uncover the Sneaky Barrier Sabotaging Your Success

[00:00:00] Have you ever felt like you're putting in all the effort but still not getting the results you want? Well, you're not alone. You're frustrated. You're racking your brain as so why is not working, and it's driving you crazy On every goal or idea that we have as people, there's often one unexpected obstacle that's quietly blocking your progress.

Today we're diving deep into identifying that barrier that might be standing between you and your dreams. However, it's probably not what you think it is. Instead, it's likely one micro issue that you aren't even consciously thinking about it at the moment, like it hasn't even occurred to you yet. I recently applied these techniques I'm gonna share with you today in this episode to my fitness journey to get back on track.

But this applies to every goal, not just fitness. It applies to any goal you're chasing, but we gotta get that. One thing that we don't even realize is blocking this. By the end of the video, you'll not only be able to identify this sneaky roadblock. Or at least have the [00:01:00] tools to identify the sneaky roadblock, but you're also gonna learn how to overcome it and finally, reach your true goals.

So let's get started. Number one is think about your default solutions. Now many people rely on familiar solutions to solve all their problems, even when they're not working. These default solutions are often based on past experiences we've had, past successes we've had. They can actually become a barrier if they prevent you from trying out new approaches.

Think of it like this. We've all had those calls with technical support and that we all love O so much. I'm on hold with tech support. If you've ever worked with technical support, you already know what the first three to five questions are, and you've probably already tried them. I mean, this has become such a thing that it's a meme.

And a running joke because it is so frustrating. 'cause we know exactly what they're gonna say. Well, [00:02:00] is your computer plugged in? Is it turned on? Is your screen turned on? That one always cracks me up. Have you tried turning it on and off again? Have you tried control Alt delete, which is a forced reboot?

Well, just like technical support, your brain goes to technical support tier one. It follows the exact same script that has always worked before based on your previous experiences. That's tier one support. That's the bottom run guys who are just reading a script that's in front of them who actually probably know nothing about your computer or your computer problems, but these four or five things always work so effectively that surely uncover 'em.

The problem is the issue this time may require going to tier two or tier three support. Have you ever gone that far? It's really frustrating trying to get there. Part of the problem though, you don't know how to get to tier two or tier three support because tier one generally does the trick. So [00:03:00] now you're stuck in, your brain is going, but this is how you do it.

Well guys, let me encourage you to step outta the box, open up to other possibilities. You did A, B, C already, right? So what information does that give you about the issue? What does it take off the table as a possibility? And start brainstorming. What else does that leave? If you're stuck, call a friend you trust and start bouncing ideas around with them, because it's amazing how often that little hidden roadblock becomes apparent when you start bouncing ideas around with somebody and out loud, not just in your head.

I promise you're gonna start finding the leads to what that hidden roadblock might be, which will help set you up to explore some of the other strategies that we're gonna dive into in this episode after we explore sleep. Because believe it or not, a good night's sleep may be the only thing interfering with your goals.

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Welcome to The Driven to Thrive broadcast purpose, growth, and lasting impact for men. I'm your host, Brent Dallen, and we help people go from living to thriving, purpose-filled intentional lives. Number two, consider the invisible scripture you live by. Now, if you're familiar with the concept of negative self-talk, you've probably heard this term before.

We all have these unconscious scripts that shape our decisions, beliefs like, I'm not good enough, or It's too late to start. That's negative Self-talk scripts that you might have heard of before if you explore that because men struggle with negative self-talk. But what about the ones that aren't flagged as negative self-talk, these subtle internalized beliefs.

Can act as [00:07:00] silent barriers preventing you from fully pursuing your goals like this one, if I can't squat heavy, what's the point of even working out guys? True story. And I almost hate to admit it, despite, despite my history of being a certified personal trainer and training people for years, I've been a lifelong gym rat.

I started working out when I was 14 with my dad and or 13 with my dad, and I've loved ever since this one thing. This belief of I can't squat heavy, so what's the point of working out is responsible for me. Tail spinning in my personal fitness. I love squats. I absolutely love squats. Squats are the answer to everything for me, as far as I'm concerned when it comes to fitness related questions.

You wanna gain muscle squat, you wanna lose fat squat, you wanna build resilience, cardio, endurance, high rep squats. Squats are the answer for almost every. Workout need you have and health need you have. It is such a [00:08:00] deeply ingrained held pillar in my own mind. When I stopped working at a commercial gym and started just training at home, I started letting my training slide because I didn't have a barbell.

I had log bars, I had a bunch of strongman influence, but I didn't have a basic barbell, and I can't eat. You can't squat properly heavy with a. Log bar, it's hard to explain, but I progressed from training six days a week all the time to not training for months and then not training for almost a year. You can have beliefs that aren't necessarily negative beliefs that are actually preventing you from doing something you really wanna do.

So take a moment, examine the stories you're telling yourself, your script that you're running out of your habit or belief that might be throwing up a roadblock. It doesn't have to be something like, I'm not good enough. It can be something like a long held belief about this is how it works. In my example, a [00:09:00] good workout starts and ends with, or doesn't start and end, but starts with squats.

All of my best workouts starts with squats. I squat at least two times, sometimes three times a week, guys. Or this is how this works or this is how we do this. Ask yourself, is this story your script true? Because it wasn't true. I could get a good workout without a squat bar. Is it accurate? Is it reasonable?

I definitely was not reasonable. Is it logical? Uh, like I should have seen all these warning signs. Does it protect me or hinder me? It was definitely hindering me, and so as Elsa puts it, it may be times to just let it go. Let it go,

guys. When I finally stopped utilizing my default answers, like scheduling and being more efficient, because I didn't have the time. Right. That's usually my go-to answers is I need to fix my schedule or I need to be more efficient with what [00:10:00] I'm doing and clean that up right? So I work harder. I fix my schedule.

I sacrifice sleep to make more time. And when I move past those default answers and start checking my internal scripts about why I believed there's no point in training for me without heavy squats, I found a solution to fix my training issues. And you can find your answer too. What's hidden barrier might be if you start with those first two things, but some of these things are really sneaky, like number three, focus on energy, not just your time.

This frequently way lays a lot of people's fitness plans, but it also affects their other goals. We often focus on time management to overcome obstacles, and that's something we talk about a lot on the channel. But the hidden barrier may be a lack of energy or focus, which is usually an energy issue.

Think about how your energy levels work throughout the day and how they align with your current task, [00:11:00] right? Imagine, if you will, every day starts with a gallon jug. Now poke a hole, small hole in the bottom of that jug. That water coming out, that's just the normal ebb and flow based on normal sleeping nutrition.

That's nothing else. That's just the fact that when you start, you have a set amount of energy and it trickles out all day. Well, on top of that, every task has a cost. If you don't prioritize the important things towards the beginning of the day, you may not just have enough capital in the form of energy left in the later part of the day.

With your current energy levels or your current output to pursue a task that you're trying to add? Like I said, this is very common when it comes to health goals. We think of work and everything else first, and our health lasts, so we get lazy with our food at night. We eat crap at night, we just shovel whatever we can.

We skip the workout because we're already tired and [00:12:00] maybe malnourished at that point. Certainly dehydrated. We have things to do at the house and we have family or friends that we wanna do, and we need some downtime for us as well, right? And by the time we actually get to the end of the day and looking at those new tasks, we just don't have it in us to do it.

Sometimes the real obstacle is not how much time you have, but whether you're using your energy and the most effective and purposeful way. This is something that business successful entrepreneur and businessman, Dan Martell talks about. In his book and on his YouTube channel is prioritizing based on energy over time and putting those bigger goals, the more important things towards the beginning of your day.

The goal you can't quite make headway on may just need to move up your schedule some, and the little hidden block you didn't realize was there is just you don't have any energy left when you get to the end of your schedule. As men, we often have a lot of our schedules [00:13:00] and we traverse the balance of attempting to do all of it.

We're we're gonna do it all right. We are constantly in the flow of that work life balance kind of thing that you hear people talk about, but we often drop the ball on one or more really important things along the way, like our relationships, which is kind of weird because that's why we do all these things to start with, right.

If along the way you're struggling with some of the important connections that bring value to your life, message me over on my website. I have a little icon in the corner where you can send me an audio, video or text message directly to my phone or DM me on my Instagram and let's talk. Maybe our relationships type program is right for you.

I'd love to help you restore those connections because without those connections, life is meaningless. So. Gimme a holler. If it's not right for you, I'll point you to someone that I think might be able to help you. Number four, identify your comfort zone traps. This is something we don't do very well with our [00:14:00] time.

We tend to think about the comfort zone as a place of safety, but the comfort zone is where dreams go to die. If you ever spent time in the gym, you know that one person that gets the same treadmill every day and has for years, but nothing's ever changed for them. Or the guy who sits in the church pew every Sunday, then acts like a jackass the rest of the time.

This is the lie of the comfort zone. It's clock punching. We go in and we put in the mental effort, effort that it make takes to make ourselves feel like we're doing something about the issues. It's easy and we do it over and over again. There's no forward po progress. But we're actively doing something.

We aren't sliding backwards 'cause we're actively going to church or we're actively going to the gym. We're not really doing anything with either of the things, but we're going to the gym or we're punching the clock of the church building, so we're taking that off. Right. The rest of it just, you know, we're good on Sunday morning.

Right. This is a comfort zone issue. [00:15:00] Doing the same routine becomes a comfort zone issue, but the comfort zone is truly the graveyard and missed opportunities and broken dreams. Look for areas in your life where you are comfortable rather than pushing yourself for growth. Now, let me get this really clear, guys.

There's nothing wrong with some comfort, but there's a difference between few moments of comfort and relaxation and. Dwelling in that comfort zone. One of the big challenges that came out of my years of doing Tough Mudder is the saying, get out of your comfort zone and do something that scares you every day, or do something new every day.

It's a great philosophy to live by, and that might be as little as just talking to a perfect stranger at the store because you're not comfortable talking to people, but. The thought reflects on the fact that that comfort zone is holding you back from doing the things you want to do. Do [00:16:00] and fear will do that, right?

We're comfortable because we're afraid of what's out there, but while we're talking about fear, let's talk about fear actually, because number five is you need to reframe your focus from what I want to, what I fear. You see often the hidden obstacle isn't something we are consciously aware of, but rather something we're trying to consciously or subconsciously avoid.

It's really funny because humans will move heaven and earth to avoid pain, discomfort, struggle. The research behind this just cracks me up 'cause it's like a four to one ratio or more. Shifting your focus from the goal itself to the fears or anx surrounding it. We'll help you uncover the unconscious barriers that are slight silently blocking your progress.

So what about the goal or the ideas actually scaring you? Now, I know as men, we're not scared of anything, but we are. Think about the movie Raiders of the Lost Ark, where Indiana Jones [00:17:00] had opened the chamber with the arc where it was buried and utter those famous words, snakes. Why'd it have to be snakes?

Sorry. That's a really bad Harrison Ford impersonation. I hope he doesn't hear that ever. Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes? But instead of going forward as the movie goes, he looked at it and said that, and then turned around and he is like, well, that's it. I'm out. Good luck. I, I found it. You guys can take care of the rest of it, but that is where I draw the line snakes.

Nope, I'm done. I'm outta here. Right. No one will talk about that movie years later. No one would care about that movie years later, and I wouldn't be referencing it right now, right? It would be a horrible movie, but that's frequently how we live our lives. Research has proven that we'll go to great links, like ridiculous kind of links [00:18:00] for people to avoid discomfort.

Fear versus what it takes to actually motivate us. We will do almost anything to get out of pain and discomfort, but it's gotta be something really great for us to actually get off our butt and do something. So maybe the question you need to ask is, what's the one thing I'm actively trying to avoid by not doing this thing?

Let's put this all together to help you escape the one thing. And, and I hate to throw out that phrase because the one thing is a great book actually, but in this case, the one thing is that hidden barrier or roadblock that's blocking you on this task or goal that you are setting yourself on. Move past those default solutions.

Time for tier three solutions. Get out of the box and you know, loop in a friend to help that conversation along. Check those internal scripts where you're telling yourself and see if they're [00:19:00] true or even accurate or useful at this point. 'cause we run a lot of outdated software in our brain. Make sure you're getting enough sleep to function well.

We're like, this way lays so many people because we don't prioritize quality sleep in our lives and our brain can't work without it. Focus on your energy more than your time. If you don't have the energy, you won't be able to get it done. And if it's. Really important to you. It may need to move up in your calendar as far as to earlier in the day.

Flee the comfort zone trap guys. Get out of those comfort zones. That is one of the top things that is holding people back and maybe change your perspective. See if fear of something is actually what's blocking you. For me, it was running outdated scripts. Believing that the standard solutions for everything for me was, you know, squatting was just the only possible [00:20:00] solution.

Guys, don't let a barbell, or in this case a lack thereof, ruin your health. Or maybe in your case, just derail a dream. Our goal, because you're not aware of whatever the current issue is, you are. Running the same gauntlet you've always run, but you just are missing that one thing. And guys, nine times out of 10 it is, it is some little tiny thing that you didn't even consider.

And if we move that linchpin, it's like bam, we're in there. Right? It, it's that linchpin mechanism. You move that one thing and all of a sudden you're off to the races. Guys with these tips and doing a little Sherlock Holmes reflection on your own, you're gonna identify the roadblock and you're gonna be on your way to your next goal.

What you'll find is one of the most impressive things of all is once you can put a name to it, you know what it is? There's a scene in the movie over the hedge, [00:21:00] great animated plum, and I reference a lot of things like that because I got kids. But these animals come out of hibernation. They built this residential neighborhood next to their woods and right on the edge of it, there's this giant hedge and they've never seen it before.

And all the animals were like, what is it? It is scary. It's horrible. And one of 'em comes up with the idea and says, let's call it Steve. Let's call it Steve. Steve. It's, and everybody's like, oh, yeah, yeah. I like Steve. Steve's way less scary. Yeah. Hey there, Steve. What? What you want? Because they don't know what it is, but once they put a name to it, the fear goes down.

Well, once you put a name to whatever this linchpin is, once you identify that little invisible blocking point, finding the solution around it is actually gonna be ridiculously easy for you. Ridiculous. In my case, I bought a barbell, no, I didn't, you know, just start working out anyway. No, I [00:22:00] bought a barbell because I really do do believe that for my workouts.

It is crucial, but once I knew what the block point was, the solution was simple. Right? Once you identify what this linchpin is in your situation, that one tiny little thing, I promise, it is something tiny and the solution's gonna be really apparent to you. So you're all set. Just go through these steps and identify what that one issue is.

Gentlemen, for more content like this, head over to purpose driven men.com, where you'll find our three shows as well as a whole lot more like a blog. We blog multiple times a week, and other content for men. Sign up for a live coaching session with me. If you're stuck, we'll work through one major issue.

That's that's what we do in our live coaching sessions. We take one issue that you're trying to deal with, I promise by the end of it, you're gonna have an action plan, guys. Thanks for hanging out today. Be better [00:23:00] tomorrow because of what you today. We'll see you on the next one. The Driven to Thrive broadcast, purpose, growth, and lasting impact for men, helping men go from living to thriving.

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